The ladies arrive early to warm the food and prepare the room. One puts out the place settings for the luncheon. Another dresses a salad, while others prepare drinks. With the coffee percolating and filled water glasses placed just so on the tables, they are ready.
Ouray residents Di Rushing and Charlie Exstrum visit before a Neighbor to Neighbor luncheon on Nov. 27, 2023. Rushing brought a salad for the lunch and Exstrum is in charge of filling water glasses at luncheons.
They come in small groups through the doors of the St. John’s Episcopal Church Parish Hall, greeting each other and finding places to sit.
Neighbor to Neighbor coordinator Kristyn Trujillo helps Carl Dismant of Ouray take off his coat, and he greets Clare Willis, who came to the luncheon from Montrose.
“Hey, kiddo,” he says. She chuckles. She’s 89. He’s actually two years younger than she is.
The sounds of joyful connection fill the room with each arrival.
Bear, a regular at the Neighbor to Neighbor luncheons, comes with his owner, Barry Swift.
“Bear, are you old enough to be at the senior luncheon?” jokes Ridgway resident Marvin Smith, petting the pup perched on a chair in the corner. Two other dogs, Yancey the Australian shepherd therapy dog, and Bella the elderly chihuahua, have already chosen their own posts.
Clare Willis and Alison Hickok catch up after arriving at the Neighbor to Neighbor luncheon on Npv. 27, 2023. In front of them, Hickok’s dog, Bella, greets Yancey, the Australian shepherd therapy dog.
At this week’s luncheon, the ladies dish up steaming bowls of chicken stew, made by Sandy Kern, and deliver them to the long tables in the dining room. The room buzzes with conversation.
Montrose resident Clare Willis, left, visits with Alison Hickok of Ouray at the Neighbor to Neighbor luncheon on Nov. 27, 2023. Willis, who is 89, tries to come to the luncheons once a month but finds Ouray’s altitude challenging.
Leslie Kemp, a retired nurse from Montrose, brought her blood pressure cuff and stethoscope this time. She wanders the room asking who wants to be checked.
“You doing OK? Want me to check your blood pressure?” she asks Jim Lyon of Ridgway.
“I don’t care. I’m OK,” he replies. She takes that as a yes and wraps the cuff around his arm. He smiles the whole time she pumps up the cuff — and when she announces he is, in fact, OK.
Retired nurse Leslie Kemp checks Ridgway resident Jim Lyon’s blood pressure during the Nov. 6, 2023 Neighbor to Neighbor luncheon. Kemp lives in Montrose and volunteers regularly for the organization, helping with everything from meal delivery to applying for prescriptions and medical care issues.
Between the main lunch and dessert, Barry Swift stands to read aloud a poem – “The Cremation of Sam McGee.”
Sometimes there’s chair yoga or other entertainment. But mostly, they just sit and visit, which is what they came to do, anyway.
While everyone enjoys thick slices of chocolate cake for dessert, the ladies fill some repurposed cottage cheese and yogurt containers with leftovers. A few seniors take them home, but they’re also for delivery to seniors who couldn’t come today.
Cecilia Harvey, who is 91, hasn’t been able to come to lunch for months. She is in hospice care at home in Ouray with cancer. She can’t make it to the luncheons, but sometimes they come to her.
Kemp walks over to her house to deliver leftovers and check in on her.
Today is an OK day to stop by.
Neighbor to Neighbor volunteer Leslie Kemp visits with Ouray resident Cecilia Harvey, who is 91 years old, in Harvey’s kitchen. Harvey used to cook meals for the Neighbor to Neighbor luncheons years ago. Now, volunteers check in on her and bring her meals.
She’s watching TV in the kitchen, in her wheelchair. Kemp visits with her and brushes her hair, and talks with her about the meals she used to cook for Neighbor to Neighbor after she retired from owning her restaurant in Ouray while raising 12 kids. Harvey talks about how everyone’s favorite was her coconut pie.
But more than anything, “I think they appreciate the get-together,” she said. “It helps because we didn’t have anything like this before.”
She’s lived here since 1950 and remembers when Neighbor to Neighbor first officially started, out of a grassroots movement to help people and an idea.
Neighbor to Neighbor’s roots
Before Neighbor to Neighbor officially started in 2006, help for older residents and people with disabilities happened less formally.
Longtime residents Roger and Angie Henn and Walt and Nancy Rule helped keep connected to those who might need help and solicited help through local church congregations, mostly.
But a more organized group with the ability to obtain funding, organize weekly luncheons for gathering and other events as well as services was needed.
Ridgway resident Donna Whiskeman proposed an organization like the one she knew from Arizona – the Carefree Caring Corps.
Neighbor to Neighbor founder Donna Whiskeman visits with others at the luncheon on Nov. 6, 2023. The luncheons are held every Monday, except some holiday weeks, at the St. John’s Episcopal Church Parish Hall at 329 Fifth Ave. in Ouray.
In June 2006, in the same parish hall where they gather for the weekly luncheon, Neighbor to Neighbor was born. Since then, the organization has provided everything from fellowship with a meal to help with bookkeeping, rides for groceries and prescription delivery, among other things.
In the past, Neighbor to Neighbor has provided funds for everything from a Life Alert bracelet to a month of nursing home care. Volunteer drivers have even transported those with medical appointments as far away as Grand Junction, or to regular appointments in Montrose.
Today, Neighbor to Neighbor has about 40 volunteers, according to Whiskeman. Nearly all of them are old enough to receive services – they’re at least 65 years old. They have a part-time coordinator, Trujillo, but she plans on leaving the position when her home sells so she can move away.
Neighbor to Neighbor coordinator Kristyn Trujillo visits with Michael Berry, 85, of Montrose before he leaves the luncheon on Dec. 4, 2023. Berry and his wife, Lynne, come to the Monday luncheons regularly.
Some volunteers have helped since Neighbor to Neighbor started, like Carol Harper. She and the other women who serve lunch tend to eat standing up, in the kitchen, after making sure everyone else has their food. Then they gather the plates and do the dishes, like Diann Correll.
“I told myself, when I turned 80 I wouldn’t be back here in the kitchen anymore,” said Correll, who turned 80 last year. “But I’m still here.”
Volunteers like Diann Correll, at left, and Di Rushing provide the lunches weekly for Neighbor to Neighbor.
Whiskeman said the organization needs more young volunteers to step up and help the elders in the community, especially with driving them to appointments or shopping, handyman aid, and other services.
She anticipates the demands for Neighbor to Neighbor’s services will only increase in the future.
The most recent report from the Colorado Rural Health Center identified Ouray County as one of the top five counties in the state with the highest rate of residents aged 65 or older.
Providing services and places for older residents to get help and connection is a challenge for rural areas with fewer resources – and all the counties in Colorado with the highest rate of older residents are in rural places.
Whiskeman herself is 77 years old. The aging group of volunteers and leaders in Neighbor to Neighbor is a concern for her when thinking about the future of the luncheons and services. Volunteers are moving away or dying faster than they’re signing up.
“There’s no one backfilling these spots,” she said.
Like being surrounded by family
Driving from Montrose to come to the luncheon is non-negotiable for Lynne and Michael Berry, who moved to the area eight years ago.
“It’s what we do on Mondays,” said Lynne.
Lynne Berry, on the left, catches up with Clare Willis at the Neighbor to Neighbor luncheon on Nov. 27, 2023. Berry, age 80, and Willis, age 89, both have moved to Montrose but continue to come to the luncheons in Ouray.
Four years ago, Michael started having memory issues. Yancey the therapy dog sticks close to him at Neighbor to Neighbor luncheons and follows him to the bathroom and back.
He’s 85 and she’s 80 now. She’s recovering from her third bout with cancer. But most weeks, they make it to the luncheons and it’s a welcome opportunity for them to socialize and share a meal with others.
For the Berrys, coming to this community that accepts them and cares is worth the drive.
Toward the end of the luncheon, the ladies surprise Alison Hickok with a dish of ice cream, topped with a single birthday candle.
Alison Hickok beams as she gets a hug from Leslie Kemp and everyone sings happy birthday to her at the Neighbor to Neighbor luncheon. She turned 65.
Everyone sings and she opens the card they passed around to sign.
She beamed as Kemp gave her a hug, before she blew out the candle.
It was a good 65th birthday, she said.
The luncheon is like being surrounded by family. “For someone like me, it’s the only birthday party I’ll get,” she said.
“We are her family, it’s true,” said Lynne. “We always know that we’re just a phone call or a text away, if we need anything.
It’s a very comforting feeling.”
If you would like to contact Neighbor to Neighbor about services or volunteering, please visit ourayneighbor.com or call 970-325-4586.
